Real Housewife of Rosemont

I have a confession to make. I watch the Real Housewives series. I mean, I am a bit obsessed with it. And I’m not just talking one or two locations. I really couldn’t tell you which group of women I love to hate the most. New York, New Jersey, Beverly Hills – I watch them all.

I’m not sure why I love them so much. Truthfully, I spend most of the time yelling at the screen. These women disgust me, and I just can’t get enough of them.

I often wonder why they don’t do a Real Housewives of the Main Line. After much thought (okay, not that much thought), I’ve decided it’s because the general public would be bored after one episode. The money is there, but really, how many tennis matches and lunches at the Country Club could you stand to watch.

I’ve contemplated what my life would look like if a camera crew followed me around.

The Real Housewife of Rosemont:

Walk the dogs
Clean the house
Throw in some laundry
Pick up the dry cleaning
Quick stop to Genuardi’s for dinner
Pay the bills
Walk the dogs again
Chauffeur the kids to soccer/swimming/volleyball/religious ed class (depending on the day)
Make dinner
Fold the mountain of clothes that have piled up on the window seat
Help with homework
Fall asleep watching Real Housewives of Beverly Hills in bed in my flannel pants and sweatshirt

Really, who wouldn’t want to watch that every week?

I could switch it up some days to make it exciting. I do have some life. Those PTO meetings can get rowdy – just bring up lice and watch those moms come to life.

Or maybe they would like to follow me to my father’s doctor’s appointment or my book club meeting.

And there is the occasional luncheon – at Cozi’s. Can’t beat a TBM sandwich and diet coke with the girls.

That’s my reality. I wear denim, not diamonds. I don’t have a chauffeur; I am the chauffeur. I drink diet coke not champagne, and my housekeeper hasn’t shown up in 21 years. (I’ve given up on her!)

I guess that’s why I love the Real Housewives series. It’s not my reality. In fact, I doubt it is even these women’s realities, but it gives us a peak at how “the other half” lives. It gives us an escape from our world, and some days, that’s kind of nice.

To Give or Not to Give

To give, or not to give, that is the question I ask myself each year around this time. Not to sound like a scrooge, but I have found that I give more gifts to peripheral acquaintances than I do to close friends and family. (Perhaps that says something about the number of friends I have?)

School teachers, religious education teachers, teachers’ aides, coaches, bus drivers, mailman, trash men, newspaper delivery person, hairdresser, piano/guitar teachers, work associates, Scout leaders… the list goes on and on.

And then there are the Secret Santa gifts, hostess gifts, neighbor gifts, and Church and school gift collections we give to.

Don’t get me wrong. I am a firm believer in the old adage ”Tis better to give than to receive,” but do I have to give to so many?

I’m a sucker for a red bucket. I’ve never met a “Toys for Tots” box I haven’t wanted to fill. And those Dear Santa letters bring me to tears every time.

The question is when and where to draw the line. When do you say enough? Like most families, we are cutting back this Christmas. Is it fair though, to cut back on any of the above individuals, all of whom do a much-appreciated service for our family?

All of these thoughts go through my head as I search for that perfect gift for the CCD teachers’ aide (whom I’ve never met but was told by my daughter is “very nice.”)

I know, money or gift cards are always appreciated, but I have a problem with giving money. My husband and his brother stopped exchanging gifts a few years ago when they realized they were simply passing money, in the form of gift cards, back and forth.

“Here’s a gift card to Lowe’s for you!”
“Thanks, and here’s a gift card in the same amount for you to Home Depot.”

Now, they wish each other a Merry Christmas with a handshake and a beer. It works for them.

I know it’s the thought that counts, but wouldn’t the thought mean more in words or gestures, not dollar signs?

Wouldn’t the mailman appreciate a cold glass of lemonade in July, and some hot chocolate in February? Wouldn’t the piano teacher like an extra week’s pay in March?

Of course they would, but does this make up for the absence of a gift in December? I don’t think so.

And so, I will continue to shop, and bake, and wrap. I will hand out my gifts with a smile and a kind word, knowing I am lucky to be able to give, even if it may be a little less than previous years.

I will wish everyone a Happy, Healthy and Peaceful 2011 and mean it. And that, in my opinion, is the best gift I can give anyone ~ the gift of positive thoughts and good will.

Tales of an Insomniac

Insomnia sucks! Is there anything worse than waking up at 3:50 am and realizing immediately you are up for good? Today, (Tonight? This morning?) a brief thought crossed my mind while in that state of being half asleep/half awake, that instantly caused me to wake up fully. It was, of course, a worry. Should I attend this event, or shouldn’t I? Will I disappoint this person if I don’t? What should I do? And that quickly my mind was up and running even though my body was far from ready to start my day.

I had two options: lay there in the dark and continue to worry, or get up and start moving. I’ve learned that there is nothing worse than fretting in the dark. I have it from good authority that everything always seems worse at night, when you can’t do anything about it.

So here I am, at 4:45 am, having put in a load of laundry, responded to a few emails, checked Facebook and played with the dogs, now watching the news and pouring out my woes to anyone who will listen.

I envy my children. I see them sleeping, sprawled out on their beds, covers half off, mouths slightly opened, deep in slumber, not a care in the world. I used to be that way. When did it change? Is it old age? Or perhaps the pressures of adulthood weighing down on me?

Whatever it is, I have found that I am spending more early morning hours awake than asleep these days. I’m trying to look on the bright side of this predicament. It’s quiet at this hour. As the saying goes, not a creature is stirring, not even the dogs (now that they’ve had their treats). I can read, write, or just daydream without hearing “Mom” every few seconds. (Of course I could also exercise, but why make an already difficult morning worse?)

I also find I do some of my best thinking and planning during this time. It’s amazing what you can get done before everyone in the house wakes up. The downside however, is that I am pretty much worthless by 9:00 pm, when my teens are just getting started.

When I look at my calendar today, I shudder. How will I make it through today on five hours of sleep? Well, I’ve done it before. I will do it again. And I will hope that this time tomorrow, (5:45 am), I will still be sleeping, and not working on my third load of laundry and second glass of diet coke!

Many thanks!

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays. It requires very little stress in my life but rewards me with lots of great food. It also allows me to slow down and reflect upon what I am thankful for in my life.

When our kids were younger, we started a journal in which we would write down what we were each grateful for. Entries always included family, good health, a delicious turkey dinner, a warm house, good friends, etc., etc.

While I am still thankful for all these things, I have come to realize that I am also appreciative of the small, seemingly inconsequential moments that can make my day.

These include, in no particular order: a short line at the grocery store; someone, anyone else making me dinner; a cold fountain diet coke; my husband unloading the dishwasher; a sunny day; homemade chocolate chips; the smell of freshly cut grass; a warm blanket; a new season of Survivor; jeans that fit; a compliment; a good hair cut; my children's laughter; a quiet house; a friend's advice; a good book; an unbroken seashell; a smile; the sunrise over the ocean, and a sunset over the bay, and so much more!

And so, on this Thanksgiving morning, I wish all a very Happy Thanksgiving. I wish you peace in your life, joy in your heart, a good, hot meal on your table and family and friends to share life's ups and downs with. And for all of those things, and much more, I am thankful.

Are you still there?

Hello? Is anyone still out there? Have you all given up on me?

I would understand if you had. I have been terribly lapse in my writing. I’ve gone through a bit of a dry spell, due in large part to a brief stint with a part-time job.

I thought I had found the perfect “mom” job – part-time, working from home. Unfortunately, it turned into more of a full-time job, working from home, office, and car.

Some of that was my fault. I am nothing if not anal, and I found I couldn’t leave it alone, a hazard of working from home.

I also discovered something else: working outside the house doesn’t stop the work that needs to be done inside the house. The laundry, dishes, cleaning and errands all still need to get done, preferably by Mom, as always.

After loosing 10 pounds (one of the good things to come out of this experience) and countless hours of sleep, I realized this was not the job for me.

And so I’m back, where I should have stayed all along. My writing, in good times and bad, calms me. It slows me down and puts things in perspective.

I cannot tell you how many times I have started writing about a question or problem I may have and, after countless revisions and re-writes, have found the problem resolved in 400 words or less, and not always the way I thought it would.

Some people can talk a subject to death – I can write one to death. And that’s okay. It works for me.

So here I am again. My apologies, especially to those who “follow” me, for whatever reason. I thank you for your patience and promise to do better in the future.

Here's to many more posts!

Goodbye Summer

I was going to write about how much I despise Labor Day – the unofficial end of summer and the beginning of school - but then I thought, how typical. I haven’t run into one mother in the past few weeks that isn’t mourning the end of these carefree summer days.

It’s not that I don’t love Fall and all it encompasses: warm sunny days, cool nights, sweaters, football games, mums, pumpkins and leaf piles. It’s just that I’m not quite ready for everything else Fall brings with it: alarm clocks, homework, schedules, sports practices and stress.

To me, Labor Day is the Granddaddy of all Sundays. I get that feeling in the pit of my stomach - that feeling I still get on Sunday nights - that the good times are over and it’s back to work (and I haven’t been in school in… quite a few years!)

So here I sit, Labor Day evening, in a quiet house, with alarm clocks set, backpacks full of shiny new school supplies and kids asleep, dreaming of the new school year, and I can’t help but think back on the summer, and how it seemed to pass in an instant. As one friend put it, wasn’t it just June 18? Where did the summer go?

It went to vacations at the beach, swim meets and baseball games. It went to morning walks with a friend, lunches at the North End Beach Grill and drinks on the deck. It went to afternoons on the beach and evenings on the boardwalk. It went to family, friends and good times.

The Summer of 2010 is over for us. Oh, perhaps summer doesn’t really end until September 23, when Autumn begins, but for the Kopp family, summer is finished. School starts tomorrow, soccer started last week, and preseason began a few weeks ago.

Now that Labor Day is (almost) over, I can look at the months ahead more objectively. The start of the school year is really a fresh start for me; almost like a new year. I make resolutions, update my calendar, clean out drawers and start new routines. It's a new beginning!

So I say goodbye to another wonderful Summer. I will pack up our pool towels, goggles, beach tags and happy memories and look forward to a fantastic year ahead. A year filled with a new school for my daughter, a new job for me, and new experiences for all of us.

Summer may be over, but never fear – I hear Memorial Day is only 266 days away!

Be Nice!

Be Nice! Two simple words we hear often when we are young. I find myself using them with my children even now, and we are definitely past the playground age.

Nice is often thought of as such a boring word, but think about it. In the dictionary, its definition is “requiring precision or tact; pleasing or pleasant; attractive; kind.”

Pleasant and kind are two adjectives that are hard to find in today’s world. We don’t see many pleasant politicians or kind entertainers. And tact? Forget it! Turn on the television and you see the opposite of nice – rude, mean, inappropriate.

An athlete cheats on his wife; a politician interrupts a proceedings; a protester screams an obscenity – this has become the norm on TV. And nothing seems to be done to these people. What are we teaching our children?

When I was young (pull out the violins) we were taught to respect our elders; what comes around goes around; there are consequences to our actions.

In today’s reality-obsessed world, anything goes.

Be nice – I would like to bring that phrase back. It’s simple. It’s straightforward. And it tells people just what we want them to do. Join me?